Crimson Stained Regrets
by KuudereKitty
Summary: How can white dreary days effect your thoughts? Izaya can't stand seeing Shizuo turn human. Shizuo can't stand himself turn into a monster. Regrets fill both their minds.


**I thought of this and wrote it on a day just like that day. While looking at the bleak sky outside, it just gave me melancholy peace. I was feeling a bit down, and I thought of this. I added a bit of my philosophy, so I apologize if you don't agree. Note: I'm a sucker more sad stories, so if you are to, you might want some tissues!**

**PS: I don't own any of Durarara! ~.~**

**I hope you like it~ ^^**

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It was a cloudy winter day in Ikebukuro. There were faint specks of snow falling in the sky. There weren't many people on the streets. Shizuo decided to go outside and see the snow. It was white, and pure while falling, but soon hit the ground an turned grey from the contaminated city streets. He thought that it was just like the people. At first pure, untroubled, then when they come to that city, their lives turn grey; and it swallows them whole. It had turn him himself into a monster. If he had never come to Ikebukuro, he never would have met Izaya. If he never met him, he might be more like a human. He wouldn't have so much anger from that informant always provoking him to chase him round the city. Shizuo just wanted to live a calm, normal life. But that flea would never allow it. To see Shizuo turn human, would have no point. Izaya's life would be boring with nobody to act different than humans. He did love them, but with simply humans, you barely get any individuality. Everyone's does life differ, but everyone always lives the same basics of human life. That dreary white sky gave Shizuo peace, he didn't even think about hating Izaya anymore. He didn't even feel like killing him. He didn't want to fight, he just...did.

Through those thoughts, Shizuo found himself standing, looking up at the sky, just wondering if he could become human. He didn't want to be a monster any longer. And if he really did kill Izaya, he would be more of a monster than ever, and then he wouldn't be able to forget it. Izaya would become his regret. That bleak sky disoriented Shizuo's thoughts. He was in absolute peace, he wished it could last forever, but he knew he couldn't control himself anymore. His body moved on its own, and he knew that when he saw Izaya's face, he would go berserk without even thinking about the aftermath. He did wish he wouldn't have given up on keeping his anger in. I guess there's another regret. Shizuo never felt that way before. He liked being human, perhaps if he turned human, Izaya would give up on him. Perhaps... Shizuo looked forward and decided to keep walking. Then something interrupted his sight.  
There was Izaya, standing only a few feet away from him, looking up at the white, blank sky. Just like Shizuo's thoughts, he unconsciously grabbed a street sign that was beside him, and yelled the brokers name.

Izaya looked at the angry beast that was running towards him. His eyes half shut, while his mouth curled up into a relaxing smile. Shizuo paused. He had only seen Izaya's mischievous grin, his devilish one. But this one, looked different than those ones. It wasn't provocative, it looked as if he was careless about life. Maybe not careless, but looking like he actually _wanted_ to die.  
It was true, he was thinking just that. _'Take me, Shizu-chan. I'm tired of all this.'_  
Though after a while of seeing that smile, it posses off Shizuo even more. He gripped the pole of the sign, and charged at Izaya; whose feet did not move from that spot. He looked up at the sky once more, and closed his eyes. Shizuo lost all thought. He was moving unconsciously like usual. He was swallowed by the city. And finally-

It started snowing heavier. People gathered around that street, and began to whisper. Regaining his consciousness, Shizuo fell on his knees and looked up at that snow falling sky. The snow hinted with grey slowly turned a deep red. The liquid slowly spread across the snow covered sidewalk. Shizuo hated himself now, Izaya had just become his regret.  
With his last bit of strength. He touched Shizuo's cheek, turning it red as well with his blood-stained hand from his wound near his chest. Shizuo looked down at Izaya's face, as he heard two small words...  
"Thank you..." Izaya's hand fell from Shizuo's face, onto the ground, and his eyes slowly fluttered shut. Such a peaceful sleeping face. Tears fell from Shizuo's eyes.  
'I didn't want to kill him. I didn't mean to! I just wanted to live a normal, peaceful life. I had no intention of this...I really am...a monster.'

Izaya couldn't stand to see his monster become human.  
Shizuo received those crimson stained regrets that would haunt him for his remaining life...

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